TOUR de FRANCE TIPPING
This is the biggest and best event on the calendar. It's time for all those that can only dream of being in the TKM ENGINE ROOM, to be part of the TKM TIPPING ENGINE. This year sees a new format, with Goon and Woody spending thousands of dollars and hundred of hours to bring you the best tipping experience in the world.
To be a part of the train and in with a chance to bring home the bacon, logon to -
All the usual sideline banter will ensue, who will survive on the train the longest. Who will shoot their entire month's load in the first night. WHO will have teh stamina to last until the Arc de Triumph. WHO WHO WHO has a management job where they can sleep behind a closed door while their assistant takes messages???
If this sounds like you then the Kingdom is your place for Le Tour Tipping 2013.
A MORNING IN THE SADDLE OF TKM
This particular morning started as per usual during Winter in Melbourne - COLD, WET, DARK.
We rolled out at 6am from Racer and half way down to Elwood bright lights appeared. They were the lights of Subaru LeTourPrologue . And the shining lights were that of TV and promises of STARDOM. TKM had made it to the PRIME TIME TV FOLKS!!!
So with the new found light, the heavy wet shoes and drifting thoughts of somewhere warmer under a doona VANISHED.
At Mordi we grouped and prepared for a fast ride home. Nothing else to mention, it was a very standard FULL NOIZE ride to BP, with speeds touching 60km/hr in most parts.
Arriving at Phamish, there were more commitments to TV and many a coffee were cut short. The price of stardom!!
Catch the Le Tour Prologue guys before the race, they guarantee an entertaining perspective of the greatest show on Earth - Le Tour.
OUT FEARLESS LEADER GOES TO WORK ONE DAY....
The logistics of living in the burbs means that Noize is only the tip of the iceberg of what is required either side of the event.
Today's circus event involved the post ride shower.
Drive to work from Phamish.
Collect clothes and toiletries left at work the day before.
Showers are being renovated so have to use temporary shower in disabled toilet.
No hot water. Average when you are trying to wash, do teeth and shave.
Freezing but clean.
Fvck. Forgot towel.
Can't use lycra to dry. Doesn't work.
Have to use shitter paper.
Shitter paper is the type that disintegrates as soon as you touch it.
26 mtres of shitter paper later I am covered in shitter paper balls.
No mirror so can't see if any are hanging from my eyebrows or lips.
Still not dry.
Clothes go on anyway.
Put product in hair.
No basin to wash hands. Have to use shower. Turn on. Sticky tap. Goes on full noize and sprays King straight in the crotch.
Well hello Thursday. Nice to see you.
Next Ride...
Tuesday morning FULL NOIZE
Thursday morning FULL NOIZE
Saturday morning HoP*, with BRX.
Latest Autumn Ranking
1st - The Farmer
2nd - The Batter
3rd - The Berger